If you're reading this before getting tf out of Dodge (or while crawling through Cape traffic), thanks for making us part of your long weekend. America is about to throw one hell of a 250th birthday party, and as the Cradle of Liberty, Boston gets front-row seats.

Want to stretch the celebration a little longer? We're giving away a Tiki Boat cruise on the Charles with cold drinks and no traffic jams. Enter to win.

THE SECRET TO MAKING BOSTONIANS LAUGH

We found a way to be nosy and call it networking. The Local's List is our weekly excuse to chat with the people making Boston cooler. This week, that's Kellie Moon, the actor, writer and comic currently performing in her 11th improv and sketch revue on the Improv Asylum Mainstage. She opens up on Boston's comedy scene, mining daily life for material and the hyper-specific references that always get the biggest laughs.

THIS WEEKEND

LOCALS ONLY

• The only thing more American than a hot dog? A hot dog dressed as a hot dog. Ween Weekend is back with free entry for dressed-up dachshunds and a longest ween contest that sounds… intriguing.

• The USS Constitution sets sail from Charlestown Navy Yard at 10AM tomorrow with a 21-gun salute at 11:30AM to honor the 250th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence.

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